With the Wind At My Back

recovery Jan 22, 2020

The alarm woke me out of a sound sleep this very cold morning. I rolled out of bed, headed for the bathroom, found my sneakers and gym clothes in the neat pile where I had placed them the night before. Half asleep I made it downstairs, let the pups out and made a fire in the wood stove. 

Then I was in the car. I noticed the console was telling me the temperature was 7 degrees. The time was 5:47 am. And for a moment I thought This is nuts. I should just go back and stay warm near the fire.  

I put the car in drive, and headed to the gym as I do a few mornings a week. And on my way, I realized how precious this moment was. The temptation to skip the gym was not too powerful. It was like I had the momentum of my routine behind me. I had the cumulative momentum of a positive habit that I had been cultivating for a few years. It was like having the wind at my back. 

For me, having the wind at my back meant that with little effort I could power through the temptation to skip the gym today. 

And what I know from many failed attempts to establish positive habits over the years, is that having the wind at my back is a precious thing. In the past, I have skipped going to the gym too often, and that positive momentum has left me. When I have squandered the grace of having the wind at my back, each trip to the gym becomes a momentous battle of the will. 

Today I learned that having the wind at my back is hard-earned and precious. I am grateful for it and, at least for today, I made it to the gym ;-)